Rejection is one of the undesirable experiences that any human being is prone to. When you put yourself out there, could be for a job opportunity, a new relationship, a promotion, you do so while expecting to be the one who gets picked; the one who triumphs over the others. But that’s not always the case. You will be turned down in areas that you possess great qualifications.
Studies have shown that pain from rejection does not necessary come from the loss itself but in how you react to the loss. The things that you tell yourself. There are people who will beat themselves up over rejection and others who use this as a chance to catapult themselves forward.
Below are some ways in which you would use to get over rejection.
1. Allow yourself to feel the emotions
After going through an episode of rejection, some people will look for distractions to avoid going through the hurt and the embarrassment that come with it. A good example is when a relationship ends and you jump into a rebound relationship.
Allow yourself to face the emotions in order to heal and be able to move forward. You will find that eventually the intensity of whatever you feel will go down considerably.
2. Treat yourself kindly
Rejection can make you question your competence. It can make you feel unworthy and underserving. You blame yourself for the turnout of things. It has to be something you did that put them off. It’s all your fault.
But it is not always about you, sometimes it’s really about them. Being unsuccessful in a job interview does not mean that you gave wrong answers or that your papers are not impressive. Exercise self-examination instead of self-criticism. Look for the areas you can improve in future interactions.
3. Look for the lessons
Every cloud has a silver lining. Look for the lessons that you can pick from being rejected. It could be improving on your interview skills, conversation skills or overall composure when attention is on you. Let your setbacks help you improve and make progress in your life.
4. Look for your support system
There are people around you who think that you are pretty awesome and accept you for who you are. These could be family or friends. Spending time with them will make you feel that you belong. They are a safe space for that pep talk or venting if you may need to.
5. List the things that you are good at
Rejection can make you feel pretty useless. It can make you question a lot about yourself and discourage you from ever trying again for the fear of being told no. It is important to remind yourself that this is only temporary and life has to go on.
Make a list of the positive qualities about you to remind yourself that who you are. This will give you energy to bounce back sooner.
6. Work on your self-esteem
Low self-esteem is what makes you vulnerable to what people say or think about you. Negative words from people amplify what you already think about yourself.
Strengthening your self-esteem will not make you invincible to rejection but will make you take it more positively.
To conclude, while rejection is part of life that’s unavoidable, one must look out for the lessons that can be picked in order to grow and be better prepared for the next opportunity.